16 July 2017

Will we adopt again?

I regularly get a few versions of the same question...

"Will you adopt again?" 
"Are you doing foster to adopt?"
"Are you guys trying to adopt again?"
"Do you get to keep this one?" (asking about our current little bonus buddy)

Here's how I usually answer...

"No? Maybe...I don't know. Probably. Probably not? Maybe? Hopefully. I think so...I don't know. It'd be cool. Probably. I...think so? I don't know. Probably not. If we can. If the opportunity comes. I hope so, I don't know, maybe, probably not, maybe, I don't know..."

I can't be much clearer than that on whether or not we'll actually add to our family but there are a few specific things I'm more sure of.

Bonus Buddy isn't staying forever. In our home he's "the baby" or just Baby, in posts when I mention him he's my little Bonus Buddy. When he came to us people kept asking, "are you keeping this one?" and then I'd explain how we don't actually know, that at the beginning of a case the goal is to go back home to biological parents, how we didn't know with Ezra until about 7 months into his case. Now I can say 100% this little guy won't be a permanent part of our family. Great things will happen for him, it'll be okay. We love him and will keep being his guardians and protectors for as long as we're his foster parents but in the story of his life that's what we'll always be, his fosterparents.

We're going to keep fostering. I love being a foster mom. I LOOOOVE being a foster mom. I love supporting the parents of the kids in my home. I love getting to know them, showing them compassionate care, and rooting for them to get back on track and for their kids to go home. If we get to adopt from foster care again then that would be great, I would love that so much. Our first goal though is always to help these littles get back home to their mom and dad.

We (probably) won't be adopting privately. The only way I can see us adopting from outside foster care is if someone who knows us asks us to adopt their child or connects us with someone looking to place. That would be a welcomed miracle but I think the chances are slim mostly because we really aren't looking, trying, or asking. We aren't going to sign up with an agency again, we don't have a profile, we aren't really out anywhere to be seen by women looking for an adoptive family. We're open to it, but not doing anything at all to pursue it.

So I don't know, maybe we'll get to add to our family again. We're open to it but we aren't pushing or chasing any options.

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